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12 Days of Christmas: A Christmas Collection
12 Days of Christmas: A Christmas Collection Read online
12 Days of Christmas
Skye MacKinnon & Arizona Tape
Josh Bertetta
Troy McLaughlan
Joynell Schultz
Bea Paige
Holly Geely
Laura Greenwood
Paula Harmon
Gina Wynn
Jenny O’Brien
Liz Hedgecock
Craig Anderson
Contents
12 Days of Christmas
Copyright Information
Introduction
Skye MacKinnon and Arizona Tape
Partridge in the P.E.A.R.
Day One
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Epilogue
Arizona’s Note
Skye’s Note
Josh Bertetta
Friday 13th December: A Parable in Two Parts
Day Two
Part I
Part II
Part III
Author’s Note
Troy McLaughlan
Three French Hens
Day Three
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Want More?
Author’s Note
Joynell Schultz
Four Calling Byrds
Day Four
Four Calling Byrds
Author’s Note
Bea Paige
Five Gold Rings
Day Five
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Author’s Note
Holly Geely
Six Geese A-Laying: A Murder Most Fowl
Day Six
Six Geese A-Laying: A Murder Most Fowl
Author’s Note
Laura Greenwood
Clipped
Day Seven
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Epilogue
Author’s Note
Paula Harmon
The Quest
Day Eight
1. Autumn Mission
2. Midwinter Journey
3. Reunion
4. By the River
5. Hunt
6. Capture
7. Pursuit
8. The Dungeon
9. The Bride and her Maids
Epilogue
Author’s Note
Gina Wynn
As Stars Align
Day Nine
As Stars Align
Author’s Note
Jenny O’Brien
10 Lords A-Leaping: Framed
Day Ten
10 Lords A-Leaping: Framed
Author’s Note
Liz Hedgecock
The Most Wonderful Time of the Year
Day Eleven
The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year
Author’s Note
Craig Anderson
12 Reasons
Day Twelve
12 Reasons
Charlotte
Jake
Jian
Janet
Paul
Scarlett
Jason
Mary
Rasha
Sarah
Dwayne
Miss Duckworth
Author’s Note
About Bookbus
Thank you from the Authors of 12 Days
12 Days of Christmas
An Anthology for Bookbus
Skye MacKinnon & Arizona Tape – Josh Bertetta – Troy McLaughlan – Joynell Schultz – Bea Paige – Holly Geely – Laura Greenwood – Paula Harmon – Gina Wynn – Jenny O’Brien – Liz Hedgecock – Craig Anderson
Copyright Information
All rights reserved. This book or parts thereof may not be reproduced in any form, stored in any retrieval system, or transmitted in any form by any means – electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording or otherwise – without prior written permission of the published, except as provided by United States of America copyright law. For permission requests, write to the publisher at “Attention: Permissions Coordinator,” at the email address; [email protected].
Cover Design by: Arizona Tape @ ArizonaType Designs
Formatting by: Gina Wynn @ Always Write Club
Partridge in the P.E.A.R © Arizona Tape & Skye Mackinnon
Friday 13th December © Josh Bertetta
Three French Hens © Troy McLaughlan
Four Calling Byrds © Joynell Schultz
Five Gold Rings © Kelly Stock writing as Bea Paige
Six Geese A-Laying: A Murder Most Fowl © Holly Geely
Clipped © Laura Greenwood
The Quest © Paula Harmon
As Stars Align © Gina Wynn
Ten Lords A-Leaping © Jenny O’Brien
The Most Wonderful Time of the Year © Liz Hedgecock
12 Reasons © Craig Anderson
All stories are a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, businesses, companies, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
Introduction
Thank you for buying a copy of the 12 Days of Christmas! 12 unique stories based on each of the 12 days. You’ll find the story title, author and genre on each title page.
Some of the authors would like me to add that they remained PG under duress, and for that I’m sorry (and kicking myself a bit!)
Apparently, I need to put more emotion into the intro, and talk about how this idea came to me while I was eating a slice of Hawaiian pizza with my brother, but realistically, I can tell you none of that, because I can’t remember, and really, it’s always all been about the fun!
All proceeds from the sale of the 12 Days of Christmas are going to Bookbus, you can find out more about them here (http://www.thebookbus.org/), but they’re a charity combatting illiteracy.
Please enjoy! And Merry Christmas!
The Authors of 12 Days of Christmas
Partridge in the P.E.A.R.
Skye MacKinnon and Arizona Tape
Day One
On the first day of Christmas my true love sent to me…
Partridge in the P.E.A.R.
Skye MacKinnon & Arizona Tape
A Sci-Fi reverse harem set in a rather pear-shaped spaceship.
Lucy Partridge is going to show the universe that she can be the commander of a spaceship. If only her crew on the P.E.A.R. weren't so sexy and distracting...
To anybody who hates Christmas
Prologue
“Merry Christmas! You are all going to die.”
The cackling laughter of the ship computer was barely audible with all the other beeping around us. Every single thing on the P.E.A.R. was malfunctioning. Explosions were shaking the ship and sparks flying from the ceiling were showering us.
“You are all going to die.”
“Could someone fucking switch off CC?” Hain roared, his hands stuck in a mess of cables under the main console. “And where the hell is Commander L?”
“Still in bed,” Birch shouted from the other side of the control room. “The Doc isn’t sure if she’ll make it.”
“Damn that woman, why did she have to get that STD? We need a captain!” Hain shouted back, his face a mixture of exhaustion and anger.
We’d been fighting against the electronics in the cockpit for over an hour now. While hurtling into the Kelstock Nebula, I might add. Who had the idea to give our board computer the personality profile of a psychopath? This was the third time this month she tried to kill us. According to Birch, it was a computer virus, but in my opinion, her AI was warped. It had happened somewhere in between the last two wormhole jumps. Before she’d been helpful and amenable like a board computer should be. But now… well, she was doing her very best to try and kill us.
“You are all going to die.”
With a roar of frustration, I released my safety belt and jumped out of my chair, running towards the captain’s seat.
“I’m taking control,” I announced to my fellow three crewmates, quickly typing the passcode into the panel on my right. They were still thinking I only got this job because of my father. Now was my chance to show them I was not only General Partridge’s daughter, but also a capable pilot in my own right. After all, none of them had grown up on a spaceship. I’d never lived on Earth, nor on any other planet. Space was my home, and I was not going to die here because of a psychotic machine.
No. Way.
“Hain, cut the power to the main computer. Smash it, if you need to. Birch, open the sun shields, we won’t be able to rely on the screens once the power goes. Rowan, page Ced, we need him now. We’re all going to die if we don’t get this thing under control, not just Captain L. We need every hand on deck. I’m going to switch to manual.”
They stared at me, wide-eyed.
“Now!” I shouted, and they sprang into action.
“You are all going to die. Slowly.”
“We’re not going to die!” I yelled, kicking the console in front of me in the hope that CC was going to feel it somehow. That computer deserved pain, so much pain.
“Initiating self-destruct sequence in T minus five minutes. You are all going to die.”
Stupid AI, whoever programmed this computer had a twisted sense of humour. And whoever installed it did a lousy job. As I danced my fingers over the control panel, I kept bumping into security walls that CC put up.
“Access denied. You are all going to die.”
I screamed in frustration, banging my fists against the machine. It was not supposed to deny me access, this code should overrule any ridiculous orders CC implanted.
“Initiating self-destruct sequence in T minus four minutes. You are all going to die. Hurray.”
“Fucking thing!”
“You sure you know what you are doing?” Hain questioned, staring at me with the same eyes everyone had. Lucy Partridge, first of her class. Her father must’ve pulled some strings. Lucy Partridge, second in command on the P.E.A.R.. Her father must’ve set it up for her. Lucy Partridge… Well, I was sick of riding on my father’s name!
“Instead of standing there, you could get to the navigation room and set up the blasters. We’re getting out of this nebula!”
Hain hesitated. “It’s no use, CC blocked all the controls…”
I yanked at another set of yellow cables and cowered under the sparks. “Let me deal with CC. This ship will be under my command in…”
“Initiating self destruct-sequence in T minus three minutes. Death should be painful.”
“Two minutes! I’ll get this stupid AI shut down for good!”
The dark-haired man threw me another look, but as I shouted: “Now!”, he seemed to decide to trust me over our deranged computer.
I rubbed my hands and cracked my fingers. Without Hain breathing in my neck, I could finally get down to business. “Alright, CC, now it’s just you and me. Prepare to be…”
“Initiating self-destruct sequence in T minus two minutes. Death is near.”
“Shut up!” I yelled, digging under the control and pulling a handful of red cables out of their sockets. This should’ve disconnected CC’s access to the speakers. Hopefully without her spouting her death wish in my ear, I’d be able to concentrate and…
“Nice try. Initiating self-destruct sequence in T minus one minute. You are all going to die. Deliciously.”
I screamed in frustration. Breaking into a faulty computer was much easier when you weren’t on the verge of hitting stray asteroids and about to be blown into a million pieces of universe. I furiously typed more code into the control panel, screaming as yet another red bar flashed across the screen.
“Access denied. Initiating self-destruct sequence in T minus fifty-five seconds. Death is permanent. For you.”
“Not if I can help it,” I muttered, wiping away the sweat pearling on my forehead. I had no choice. I’d have to use that code. The one that I’d promised never to use. But with death fifty seconds around the corner, I’d think my father would forgive me for using it.
M. N. 1. O. 9. 6. O. 9. 7.
“You are not General Partridge. Access denied. Initiating self-destruct sequence in T minus forty seconds. Prepare to die.”
How was this possible? With everything I did, CC seemed to become more and more autonomous. Even with this code, the one that my father swore would overrule any AI, I couldn’t get a grip on this rotten machine.
“You do know that if we die, you go down with us?” I snarled at the blinking screen in front of me.
The comms crackled close to my ear. “Blasters on standby.” Hain, doing what I asked him to. He could be infuriating, but he was also reliable. But having the blasters ready wouldn’t help if CC didn’t give me access to the flight controls. Damn that—
“Apology accepted. Please continue.”
The big blinking countdown numbers disappeared from the main screen, now showing the terribly close Kelstock Nebula.
“What the stars are you playing at, CC?” I screamed into the silent room. Silence. Wow. What happened to all the beeping?
The comms broke my moment of confusion. “Luce, the engines stopped. What’s going on up there?”
How about, I don’t know? I looked at the control screens. Everything was working as it should be. The only warning lights still blinking were letting me know that we were about to plunge into a deadly nebula. I took a deep breath. The situation wasn’t over yet.
“Would you like to die?” CC suddenly piped up again.
“No, we don’t want to die!” I shouted into the room. The AI’s speakers were placed all around the ship, so it was hard to know where to direct my anger. CC was everywhere, on every screen, in every room.
“Good of you to say that. Shall I fly to a safer destination?”
“Didn’t you want to kill us just a moment ago? What changed?!”
“Ha. Ha. It was just a joke. Self-destruct sequence aborted. I will drive the ship into a more suitable environment. Have a nice day.”
I was speechless. And that didn’t happen very often. I was thrown back into my seat when the ship suddenly turned, slowly flying away from the nebula. But I was too suspicious of CC’s intentions to relax. You don’t try to kill me and get away with it. I was going to kill her, code by code. And when I was done with her, I would fly this ship myself, the old-fashioned way. I had flown my first toddler rocket when I was two.
With a soft hiss, the doors slid open and Cedar’s head appeared. “You called?”
I let my head fall back. As much as I admired Cedar, he was always, always too late. Which was ironic since he was trained and very skilled in first aid and all that other medical yadda yadda.
“CC was trying to kill us, but turns out, it was just a practical joke.” I sighed in exasperation, throwing my hands up. How a computer can turn homicidal, I will never understand. If this was part of the mission, they should’ve mentioned it in the briefing. I could deal with aliens, I didn’t mind being on a ship for mo
nths, and I couldn’t care less about the all-male crew. But artificial intelligence that regularly tried to kill us? That went even beyond my payroll.
“Again? That is the third time this month,” Cedar muttered, rubbing his hand over his five o’clock shadow.
I nodded. “Correct, but who’s keeping count, really,” I sarcastically added, glaring angrily at the black screen. Now that she was flying us away from the Kelstock Nebula, CC was oddly quiet, even for her. I could only guess what her next “joke” would be and hope that I’d figure out how to uninstall her program before she had another chance to kill us. I didn’t like admitting it, but if she hadn’t deactivated the self-destruct program, it might’ve been the end for us. Speaking of the end...